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Netflix's The Ultimatum: Queer Love, which couples are still together?

What are we going to do with our lives now this is over?

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Netflix's The Ultimatum is back and this time, the series has an all queer cast for The Ultimatum: Queer Love. Hosted by JoAnna Garcia Swisher, the series sees five female and non-binary couples come together, with one half of each couple having offered their partner an ultimatum to get married or end the relationship.

As part of the experiment each couple must "break up" and form new relationships with the other contestants, to see how they feel about their original relationship and if they could find love elsewhere. At the end of the experiment they then must decide to marry their original partner, marry their new partner or leave both relationships behind.

The first four episodes dropped on 24th May, with the following episodes dropping consecutively for the next few weeks. The final episodes, including the very heated reunion, dropped today (7th June) and we finally got an update on where our five couples are now. And wow there is a lot to unpack.

This is everything you need to know about which original The Ultimatum: Queer Love couples are still together.

1

Xander Boger and Vanessa Papa

the ultimatum queer love couples still together
Netflix

Relationship status: Broken up

Xander and Vanessa were actually friends before they started dating and were introduced to each other by their boyfriends at the time when they were still in high school. A few years later and the pair got together. They're now both 30 years old and have been together for the past four years and live in Hawaii.

Xander, who is a physical therapist and yoga instructor issued the ultimatum to Vanessa, who is an influencer. However, Vanessa is hesitant about marrying Xander as she's worried about losing her freedom.

Following their breakup on the series Xander began dating Yoly and the pair seem to be getting on very well at the moment, with the pair sharing similar views and a lot of intimacy. Vanessa meanwhile is dating Rae, however she has admitted she doesn't really see a romantic connection with Rae.

After their first trial marriages with Rae and Yoly were over, the pair moved back in together for their trial marriage. During the group dinner Vanessa expressed her change in desire to get married to Xander, however Xander seemed very conflicted and still seemed to be attached to the idea of marrying Yoly.

During their trial marriage Xander continued talking to Yoly and the pair were seen getting very close at the group drinks later on. Vanessa planned a hot air balloon date for Xander and tried to prove to her she was ready for marriage.

However, over the course of their trial marriage the pair seemed to grow closer again and on their final night before their decision, Xander said she wasn't "over this yet", suggesting she may be leaning towards getting engaged to Vanessa.

During the final episode, neither Xander nor Vanessa proposed, as Xander said she felt she couldn't give Vanessa "a lot more than I can offer you right now" and Vanessa said this wasn't how she saw their experience going. The pair left each other full of tears but also a lot of love and respect for the other.

Xander then went to speak to Yoly and told her how much she wanted to be with her, however Yoly revealed Mal proposed to her earlier that day and she said yes. Yoly added that she still loved Xander but she was going to go ahead and be with Mal.

In the reunion episode, there was no sign of a reconciliation between the pair, with Xander and Vanessa revealing they don't talk anymore. Vanessa added she loved Xander as a friend and the show had made her realise they weren't meant to be together. They were both quite tearful and said they wanted to move on with each other in their lives as friends.

2

Sam Mark and Aussie Chau

the ultimatum queer love couples still together
Netflix

Relationship status: Engaged

31-year-old Sam and 42-year-old Aussie have been together for just over a year, after meeting on a LGBTQ+ social group during the pandemic.

Sam is the one who issued an ultimatum of marriage to Aussie as she thinks now is the time to settle down. However, Aussie is hesitant and thinks they should live together for five years before getting married.

After their breakup Sam began dating Tiff, however at the moment their relationship doesn't seem to be going too well. The pair have disagreed over Sam's commitment to Tiff's dog and don't seem to be gelling at all.

Aussie, is dating Mildred and whilst things started off well between the pair, in the most recent episode the pair argued whilst getting ready for a night out and Mildred argued that Aussie avoids having conversations with her on and off camera.

During the group night out Sam tried to explain Aussie's behaviour to Mildred, suggesting some form of affection is still there.

In Aussie's trial marriage to Mildred, Aussie ended up leaving halfway through and Sam didn't seem to grow closer to Tiff during their trial marriage.

When it came to Sam and Aussie's trial marriage it appeared the pair were happy to be reunited however, things slowly worsened when Aussie walked away from Sam during a moment when they were having a difficult discussion.

Throughout their trial marriage things seemed tense, and in the teaser for next week's final decisions Sam can be seen saying: "I don't know if Aussie is ready to be what I need for me."

However, it appears Aussie is ready to be what Sam needs, as Aussie proposed during the final episode. At first it appeared Aussie was just going to give a labradorite gem to show their love but then Aussie did propose and Sam happily accepted.

During the reunion episode the couple revealed they are still together and happily engaged. They said they're still working on their communication issues and Aussie hasn't yet shared with their family about Sam yet.

The couple said they were potentially planning for two weddings, with one in Australia with Aussie's family.

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3

Mildred Woody and Tiff Der

the ultimatum queer love couples still together
Netflix

Relationship status: Broken up

33-year-old Zumba instructor Mildred met 32-year-old podcaster Tiff, after Tiff slid into her DMs two years ago. They've been together ever since and live in California.

Mildred offered the ultimatum to Tiff, as she wants to get engaged and progress their relationship, however Tiff is concerned they don't have their communication sorted out.

During the ceremony in which they all picked their new partners, Tiff was seen getting very emotional at the idea of not being with Mildred and Mildred moving on with someone else.

However, Mildred decided to couple up with Aussie but still seemed upset about Tiff. Tiff then recoupled with Sam.

Whilst Mildred's relationship with Aussie was good at the beginning the most recent episode has seen tension with the pair. And Sam and Tiff also don't seem to be getting along too great either.

Following their trial marriages neither Tiff nor Mildred appeared to really bond with Sam or Aussie, making it very clear their decision was not if they wanted to be with another person but whether or not they could make their on again off again relationship work.

During the couple's trial marriage, whilst they seemed happy to be back together they had many disagreements and attempted to work on their communication.

In the final episode after an emotional conversation on the edge of a literal cliff, Tiff proposed to Mildred and she very happily accepted.

During the reunion episode the pair revealed they were no longer together whilst discussing Tiff's dog's surgery. Mildred argued there were many problems between the pair and she made the decision to end the relationship.

Tiff disagreed with this and said there were many problems in their relationship. Mildred went onto reveal she had been arrested after an argument with Tiff in which Mildred threw a pet gate at Tiff. Mildred then apologised for doing so.

Mildred also revealed Tiff had been on a dating app whilst still living at the same property after they broke up. She then accused Tiff of bringing women back to their flat, which Tiff denied.

The reunion episode saw Tiff leave early and Mildred saying she was still processing their relationship. Here's hoping they're both doing ok.

4

Mal Wright and Yoly Rojas

the ultimatum queer love couples still together
Netflix

Relationship status: Broken up

34-year-old Yoly and 36-year-old Mal met three years ago at Chicago Pride and have been together ever since. In that time they've broken up once and moved to Washington state together.

Yoly was the one to offer the ultimatum to Mal, but Mal would rather wait until the couple were more financially stable before tying the knot.

After their breakup Yoly began dating Xander and the pair seem to be getting on very well, with the most recent episode seeing the pair get intimate.

Mal began dating Lexi, and they are also getting on very well, with lots of honest conversations about their goals and the future. The pair said they could already see themselves getting married and having babies together.

However, Mal and Yoly seemed to be on two very different pages by the time their trial marriage came around. Mal realised during her trial marriage with Lexi, that she was committed to Yoly and now wanted to marry her.

Yoly, who initially gave the ultimatum, now found herself in love with both Xander and Mal. Whilst she was happy to be back with Mal, she also appeared to be missing Xander heavily.

Yoly reunite with Xander at the couples drinks and the pair found it very difficult to be apart.

Throughout the trial marriage Mal remained committed to the idea of marrying Yoly, whereas Yoly remained confused over her feelings.

Episode eight ended on a complete cliffhanger after Mal proposed to Yoly and at the start of the final episode Yoly accepted Mal's proposal, but said she still felt like she loved Xander.

Yoly went and saw Xander after Xander told Vanessa she didn't want to be with her. Xander then told Yoly she wanted to be with her and spend their lives together, however Yoly revealed she accepted Mal's proposal. The pair hugged and told each other how much they loved each other, but ultimately Yoly decided to go ahead with her relationship with Mal.

However, during the reunion episode Mal revealed the pair are 'happily broken up'. Yoly said the pair broke up two weeks after getting engaged, which Mal disagreed with. Mal then went onto explain how hurt she had been watching the series back and felt betrayed by Yoly's actions with Xander at times, which Yoly apologised for.

It appears Yoly may have moved onto a new relationship after she shared a TikTok (that's since been deleted) of herself looking at a mystery person in a kitchen and captioned it: "When bae didn't buy your coffee this morning."

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5

Lexi Goldberg and Rae Cheung-Sutton

the ultimatum queer love couples still together
Netflix

Relationship status: Broken up

The final original couple is 24-year-old Lexi and 27-year-old Rae who met three years ago on Bumble and have been together even since.

The pair live in California, and Lexi offered Rae the ultimatum as she said she's ready to get married but Rae isn't so sure.

Following their breakup on the series, Lexi began dating Mal and fans have been loving their relationship as the pair seem to have genuinely connected.

Rae meanwhile, is dating Vanessa, who Lexi doubts is on the series for the "right" reasons. Rae has been intimate with Vanessa, which caused Lexi to be very upset when she found out.

Things started off tense for Lexi and Rae's trial marriage, after Lexi was still feeling upset with Rae for sleeping with Vanessa. Lexi also expressed she didn't feel like a priority in the relationship to Rae and whilst she appeared to have feelings for Mal, it seems her relationship with Rae has taken priority.

The couple went for dinner with Lexi's parents and whilst they seemed to be on a better track, by the eighth episode, Rae still seemed undecided about the status of their relationship.

She told Lexi: "I think forever is hard for me. This is a big commitment. It’s a weird situation. It is the ultimatum. Like I feel back-against-the-wall and it’s either making a decision or losing you. But there’s like so many factors that kind of get in the way or, like, block me or make me second-guess things.”

However, it appears 'forever' wasn't too difficult of a decision for Rae as in the final episodes she proposes to Lexi, Lexi immediately accepts and then Lexi turned around and did her own proposal to Rae. A double proposal? We love to see it.

And during the reunion episode the couple revealed they are still together and engaged. They have moved to California, gone on holiday and are slowly starting to plan their wedding. They also added they have begun planning for how they want to have children together, but want to focus on getting married first.

However, the couple have since revealed they broke up following the reunion and Lexi is in a new relationship.

Lexi told Tudum, she is no longer with Rae as she is "just not the right person for what I want" in a life partner.

Rae said that following the reunion, Lexi had a new career and they were still navigating things in their relationship which led to their breakup.

"We were good at the reunion, and then afterwards we were still rehashing things. [Lexi] started a new career and her lifestyle really changed and we were having trouble navigating that and things from the past. It just kind of just got to a point where we couldn’t come to terms on certain differences," she said.

Lexi is now in a new relationship and says of her new partner: "I found somebody that gives me all of the love and happiness I felt with Mal, mixed with an intimacy that we’re exploring."

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