While fortunately, at last, it’s becoming the norm for women to embrace their sexuality, in general men still have an awkward relationship with their bodies. The social and cultural taboos surrounding male sexuality means sadly it’s true many men don’t discuss their private desires with the same kind empowerment as us millennial women.
This is also true of what the less forward thinking sex toy companies class as "male sex toys" (aka toys that work for people with penises and prostates), which have some kind of weird and totally outdated stigma surrounding them. Maybe it’s because we’ve been conditioned to think of people who blow their load into toys that look like disembodied vulva-tubes as bit ‘creepy’ – but whatever the reason, it’s bullshit. Besides the obvious (i.e. it’s fun, let people live!), there are countless reasons why people who have penis-having partners should be using sex toys with them.
LELO’s sex expert Stu Nugent explains the benefits...
1. It’ll boost their sexual confidence
There is nothing sexier than confidence. Sex toys can help you boost your confidence and your self-esteem, making you more attractive and potentially leading to more and better sex. Sex toys represent the ultimate virtuous circle, in which there are nothing but benefits and pleasure to be gained. You just have to take that first little step.
Lube, FYI, is an incredible sex toy. It's not daunting or intimidating, and makes hand jobs, blow jobs, penetrative sex, everything, better and more enjoyable for the receiver. Here are some of our all time faves:
Coco de Mer
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JimmyJane Organic
Simply Pleasure
£17.95
Jimmyjane
Sliquid
LELO
2. They can help them last longer, feel more and satisfy you better
Orgasm control is greatly improved with the use of sex toys. Even something relatively simple like the TOR 2 cock ring makes someone's erection bigger, more sensitive and they’ll be able to delay ejaculation easier. It'll also vibrate against your clitoris in many sex positions. That’s a pretty good deal.
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3. They’ll get better at sex
Everything in this article will make him a better lover, and that’s all thanks to sex toys. Being more comfortable in their own body, being able to tell you what they want, being able to reciprocate, having more experience, this all ends up to better sex.
4. The toys are super cool these days
Let’s just clarify something: sex toys have changed a lot of late, and the demand for old rubber pocket-vaginas and inflatable sex toys is falling (not that there's anything wrong with those, if that's what you're into). Instead, men and people with penises are looking for the same kind of quality in their sex toys that has been available to vagina-havers for years. The market is doing well right now, and the technology is incredible.
Seriously, this anal massager stimulates the prostate by “beckoning back and forth like a lover’s finger”. It stimulates the perineum at the same time.
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5. It’ll improve their overall health
There’s an undeniable correlation between male orgasms and health. Just for starters, the chemicals released and produced by orgasms can have unexpected effects – including increased memory capabilities and brain function. They can help you sleep better, make you look younger, and much more. There’s also growing evidence that prostate massage is beneficial for reproductive health over all.
6. They’ll start to take control of their own desires
Too often, men and penis-owners go through most of their lives unsatisfied with their sexual encounters and a vague sense that there’s more to sex than the kind they’re having. That’s usually because they don’t know exactly what it is they want from sex, or they don’t have the tools, experience or confidence to ask for it from a partner. Them using sex toys alone (and with you) will help them learn exactly what their desires are – and how to articulate them.
Cosmopolitan UK recommends
Best for all the sensations
Lovehoney Bionic Bullet Rabbit Vibrating Cock Ring
Pros
Triple stimulation
Waterproof
Cons
Battery-powered (and not included — boo!)
Get ready for triple the fun! Not only does this Lovehoney cock ring come with two rings – a textured ring for the shaft and another for the balls – but it also boasts vibrating rabbit ears, so both of you can climax at once.
Not just that, but the versatile toy comes with two vibration speeds and three patterns. The bullet is removable, too, so you can have some added hand-held fun.
Best rechargeable cock ring
So Divine Rechargeable Vibrating Cock Ring
Pros
Dual stimulation
Rechargeable
Cons
Can’t be used with silicone lube
Made of soft silicone, So Divine’s rechargeable cock ring is flexible and comfortable.
As it comes with a vibrating clit stimulator, it’s also perfect for couples. Choose from its 10 vibration patterns (controlled via its singular button, yipee!), then lie back and enjoy pure pleasure together.
Pros
Snug fit so you don't have to worry about it sliding around
Stretchy silicone to accommodate different girths
Cons
App has some connectivity issues, according to some users
If you want a cock ring that’s powerful, discreet, and super sleek, now’s the time to invest in LELO’s TOR 3. If you're not familiar with LELO's work, its silky silicone is truly unmatched in the sex tech space (we don't know how they do it!), so without having to turn the toy on it provides sensory delight for the wearer.
But with eight powerful vibration settings, this is a toy that provides pleasure for two. You can even sync it with the LELO app so you don't ever have to stop thrusting.
Best silicone cock ring set
Je Joue Silicone Cock Ring Trio
Pros
Waterproof
Affordable
Cons
You'll have to remember which ring is which intensity as they're all the same size
For those wanting to work their way up to better and more prolonged orgasms, then you should give Je Joue’s simple but luxurious cock ring trio a go.
Made from super-soft silicone, each ring gets progressively tighter, so you can experiment with heightened intensities. Plus, they’re really stretchy, so can work with almost any size dick — but don't hold back!
You can also play around with using a ring on your balls and willy at the same time, or if you're playing with another penis-possessor, you could each wear one at the same time.
Best vibrating adjustable ring
Ann Summers Vibrating Adjustable Cock Ring
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Pros
Removable bullet
Suitable for any shape and size
Waterproof
Cons
Battery-powered
Doesn't go as tight as other rings
This vibrating cock ring from Ann Summers is adjustable, making it suitable to any shapes and sizes – though some reviewers report that it doesn’t go quite as tight as other toys. But that might be a bonus for beginners.
When it comes to vibrations, it boasts 3 speeds and 4 patterns, and the bullet is even removable for precise clitoral stimulation. It’s also waterproof, so you can bring it with you for some shower fun. It is battery-powered, though – but your first three are included.
Best for rumbly vibrations
Atom Plus Vibrating Cock Ring
Pros
Shape means it won't slide around
Both of you get in on the fun!
Cons
Battery only lasts 40 minutes
There's no reason your perineum should miss out while your partner enjoys all the fun. Obviously, Hot Octopuss is clued up on this, as it's created a dual motor vibrating cock ring.
Its wide shape means the five speeds and five patterns are sent forwards to your lover's C-spot or perineum (depending what position you're in) and backwards towards your own perineum.
Plus, the vibes are deep and rumbly, so you don't have to worry about your underside going numb with buzzy vibrations, if that's not your thang.
Best for hitting the spot
Fun Factory NŌS Rechargeable Rabbit Cock Ring
Pros
Two motors for shared vibrations
Rechargeable
Sleek, modern design
Cons
Some reviewers say the ring is a little tight
This cock ring by Fun Factory is designed for shared pleasure. Shaped with couples in mind, the NŌS has two flexible rabbit ears, each with its own motor for strong, rumbly vibrations that’ll be felt by both of you.
Not just that, but the actual ring is shaped for maximum pleasure, swapping the traditional circle shape for a circle with textures – to squeeze the shaft in just the right places. There’s one downside of this for some, as a couple of reviewers say that the ring can be a little on the tight side. Something to consider if you’re on the larger side.
This rechargeable cock ring also has 4 vibration settings, a ‘flirt’ setting, and comes with its own biodegradable storage bag. Oh, and it’s waterproof.
Best app-controlled cock ring
Pros
App-controlled
Waterproof
Cons
High-priced
If you’re looking for a premium cock ring, We-Vibe has you covered.
With the Verge, you can choose whether you want your vibrations to pulse, tease, go into ultra, and more, with eight unique modes that’ll hit the spot for both of you.
As an added bonus, you can control it all from the palm of your hand with the We-Vibe app. And, as it’s waterproof, you experiment with wet play, too – maybe leave the app out of that though!
Best for added texture
Lovehoney Bed Ringer Rechargeable Double Cock Ring
Pros
Two rings for enhanced pleasure
Travel lock
Strong vibrations
Cons
The ring might be tight for those on the bigger side
Can be tricky to turn on at times
Not only does Lovehoney’s Bed Ringer cock ring boast a double ring – one goes over the cock and balls, while the other wraps around the shaft – but it also has 12 vibration settings (which reviewers say are impressively powerful) and a rechargeable battery.
Even better, it comes with a travel lock and it’s waterproof – the perfect holiday BFF.
Best remote-controlled cock ring
Ann Summers Fusion Remote Control Cock Ring
Pros
Remote-controlled
Great for long distance lovers
Removable bullet
Affordable
Cons
Can't be used with silicone lube
If you’re interested in a remote-controlled cock ring, but want something on the cheaper side, look no further than this Fusion ring from Ann Summers.
The remote controls the removable bullet, so can be used during partnered or solo play – and for all of your erogenous zones. It’s also rechargeable, so you’ll never be without juice when you need it – something battery-operated toys can’t offer.
Best for grinding
Bondara Nookie Monster Rechargeable Cock Ring
Pros
Rechargeable
Double ring for extra pleasure
Waterproof
Cons
Only compatible with water-based lube
This bright blue cock ring from Bondara comes with not one but two rings – one to loop behind the cock and balls and another to wrap around the shaft. All topped off with 10 rumbly vibration modes, boosting pleasure for you and your partner (or, if you’re solo, just you).
The rings are snug-fitting, too, making this a great choice for anyone who struggles with erectile issues, or who’s just looking for firmer, fuller erections. It’s also rechargeable!
Best for precise stimulation
Pros
Dual stimulation
Waterproof
Cons
High price point
This cock ring won’t just get one of you off. As well as boasting an extra-stretchy ring – making it a great fit for most men – iroha’s SVR+ comes with an upright stimulator to expertly target the clit, leaving no surface unpleasured.
Because of its single button operation, it's also super easy to operate, meaning its five vibration intensities and three patterns can even be altered during sex.
7. It’ll make them get to know themselves better
Using penis and prostate-specific sex toys are a shortcut to better intimate understanding. Not in a gap year in Goa trying to ‘find yourself’ kind of way, but in a much more real and physical kind of way. Someone knowing their body and all the things it can do hugely increases their overall wellbeing. It’s like maintenance - the better you understand how your laptop works for example, the better you become at getting the most out of it.

Paisley is the former Sex and Relationships editor at Cosmopolitan UK. She covers everything from sex toys, how to masturbate and sex positions, to all things LGBTQ. She definitely reveals too much about her personal life on the Internet.