Let’s talk about vaginas. Or, rather, let’s talk about the many different words people use for them. Why? Because some might feel that the anatomically correct term for vagina (aka—one of the most important body parts in existence) is, uh, a little too pearl-clutchy for everyday conversation. So instead, there are about a million words from “coochie” and “hoo-ha” to “panty hamster,” all in an effort to avoid actually saying the word “vagina.”
But here’s the thing: Vagina isn’t a dirty word! Neither is “vulva,” which—PSA—refers to the external parts of the (you guessed it) sex organ sometimes called the (say it with me) vagina. A quick anatomy lesson: The term vulva includes the labia and clitoris, while the term vagina actually refers to the internal canal. The more you know, right?
Anyway, these words are real, medical, and should be normalized—not censored or swapped out for euphemisms whenever you need to make a doctor’s appointment or reference your own anatomy.
Now that we’re all on the same page, another thing is simultaneously true. Slang is, well, fun. And just like we’ve embraced nicknames for literally every other body part and sex position out there, we can have a little fun here, too. Whether you’re looking for something playful, cheeky, or just totally absurd, we rounded up the wildest, weirdest, and most creative vagina slang out there. I mean, it was ol’ Billy Shakespeare who said, “a vagina by any other name would taste as good.” I’m paraphrasing, of course, but you get it.
Just remember: You can call it whatever you want—but the vagina deserves to be talked about with confidence. And for the record, I don’t recommend calling up your gyno and saying you’re having an issue with your “penis fly catcher.” Something to keep in mind!
1. Fanny
Still used across the pond to mean vagina, but in the U.S., we know it as…your butt. So yes, it’s confusing, but we’re here for it.
2. Pussy
A little spicy, a little sexy, a little cat-coded. Forever a classic.
3. Vag
Short, snappy, and straight to the point. A no-frills kind of girl, but she's got places to be.
4. Bits
Perfectly vague and weirdly polite. The HR-safe version of “my vag.” (“My bits need a break” = universally relatable.)
5. Undercarriage
Sounds like something from Car Talk, but we’ve all said it while trying to sound cute at the OB-GYN.
6. Bajingo
If a vagina had its own carnival game. Bright, bouncy, and bizarrely fun to say.
7. Foof / Fufu / Foo foo
Cute in theory. But very much preschool-core. Retire by age 9.
8. Yoni
A sacred term rooted in Sanskrit, often used in spiritual or wellness spaces to refer to the vagina or divine feminine. Big yoni steam energy.
9. Thingy
For when you’re avoiding the convo and the word. Classic panic move.
10. Vajayjay
Oprah said it on her show after Miranda Bailey said it on Grey's Anatomy and we never looked back. Whimsical, dramatic, and slightly ridiculous—in a good way.
11. Kitty
Pussy’s coy little cousin. Cute if you’re flirty. Creepy if you’re a grown man saying it.
12. Vagine
The fancy alter ego of your vag. French. Rhymes with tagine. Hard not to admire.
13. Bean
Yes, it’s a clit nickname. No, literally “flicking it” isn’t always the move. (But, uh, might I suggest these clit vibrators?)
14. Cookie
There does seem to be a food theme here, and this one’s equal parts sweet and slightly unsettling.
15. "Down There"
Used by everyone’s mom and awkward middle school health teachers.
16. Downstairs
See above. Also confusing if you’re actually just headed to the kitchen.
17. Twat
Hard to say without sounding like you’re picking a fight in a Guy Ritchie movie. Just…maybe skip?
18. Hole
So reductive. Like, why even bother?
19. Box
Somehow both graphic and vague. But hey, you do you
20. Penis Fly Trap
Terrifying visual. A+ pun. Zero stars for realism.
21. Sex
“Touch my sex” = zero vibe. Please do not.
22. Fandango
Could be a dance, could be your vag. Either way, she's got flair.
23. Cunt
The Big One. Offensive to some, empowering to others. Handle with care.
24. Flower
Your great-aunt probably said this while crocheting. Sweet, but kinda dated.
25. Beaver
The animal? Cute. The euphemism? Kinda... not.
26. Muff
If you’re into vintage slang and bushy situations. No notes.
27. Curtain Call
Dramatic? Yes. Accurate? Debatable. Still kinda iconic? Absolutely.
28. *The Silent Point*
We all know it. We’ve all done it. It says everything and nothing at once.
29. Doo-dah
Could be a remote. Could be your vagina. Either way, treat it gently.
30. Below Deck
Not the Bravo show—though she is capable of dramatic plot twists.
31. Whispering Eye
Weirdly poetic. Also, horrifying if you picture it whispering.
32. Coochie
Slang royalty. Flirty, familiar, and fun to yell across a girls’ group chat.
33. Velvet Underground
Sexy. Luxe. Possibly owned by a dominatrix with a PhD.
34. Lady Garden
If you're referring to your pubes and also possibly growing peonies. Kinda cute, kinda musty.
35. Minnie
The childhood vagina euphemism of choice much to Minnie Mouse's dismay.
36. Meow
Are you a cat? Are you just being sassy? Either way, we see you.
37. Noo-Noo
No no no.
38. Lady Bits
Vague and really not gender-inclusive—skip!
39. Pocketbook
Vintage auntie energy. We don’t hate it?
40. Snatch
Sounds aggressive. Almost like a raccoon stole it. 2/10.
41. Pussoir
Algospeak gold. Slightly ridiculous, kind of chic.
42. Tulip
Floral! Delicate! Slightly misleading!
43. Hoo Ha
The blueprint for every other “oo” slang word. Weirdly timeless.
44. Nonny
Sounds like someone’s grandma. Not the vibe.
45. Pink Taco
You know exactly what this means. And you're blushing anyway.
46. Panty Hamster
Whoever coined this was unwell. Pure chaos. Going to use it constantly.
47. C U Next Tuesday
Not subtle. Not sweet. But if you need to say it and not say it, go off.
48. Vertical Smile
A little charming, a little creepy. Tooth jokes = automatic DQ.
49. Cha Cha
Another dance floor/vag crossover. Sexy and coordinated.
50. Cherry
The “popping” concept is long gone, but there’s still something sexy about the fruit (and what it means when someone's good with the stem).
51. Honey Pot
Cute, sticky, potentially delicious. We're listening. (Especially sexy when said by Jaime from Outlander.)
52. Slit
Oof. It’s a no for me.
53. Nether Regions
Sounds like a Renaissance fair term for your vag. Pass.
54. Peach
The emoji, the fruit, the euphemism. We’re here for it.
55. Wee Wee
Unless you're a toddler, it's best not to go there.
56. Business Casual
When you want to be vague, sterile, and slightly flirty all at once.
57. Hairy Potter
Why not just slither into my Chamber of Secrets while you’re there?
58. Flaming Lips
An indie band and also your crotch!!! Rock on, babe.
59. Whirlpool
Wet, mysterious, slightly dangerous. Honestly? Kind of hot.
60. Happy Clam
Not loving the sea creature metaphor, but at least she’s happy!
61. Happy Clam
While we don't love the association with sea creatures, this is at least a cheerful name. (No seriously, what's wrong with just calling it a vulva guys? It's the anatomically correct name, after all! 😭)
62. Chat
French for “cat.” Automatically sexy because France.
63. 🐱
Why say it when you can emoji it?
64. Pum Pum
Jamaican slang with main character energy.
65. Itching Jenny
In a deeply upsetting turn of events for anyone named Jennifer, the term 'itching Jenny' was apparently slang for female genitalia back in the 1800s.
66. Garage
See the Cardi B lyrics in WAP ("I want you to park that big Mack truck right in this little garage") for further details.
67. WAP
Another Cardi gem. WAP = Wet. Ass. Pussy. Enough said.
68. Spelunking Zone
For the adventurous. Headlamp not included.
69. Tunnel of Love
Romantic, mysterious, and possibly theme park-related. We love a double entendre.
70. Vulva
The real MVP. The correct anatomical term. Say it with pride—she’s earned it.
