30 Valentine’s Day sex positions to make it the hottest night of the year

How to do it: Prepare (or order) a glorious spread for your partner, including themed mock- or cocktails. Afterwards, hand them a special Valentine’s dessert with a (cock) ring on it.

Pros: Staying in is more intimate than going out to a restaurant with every other couple, plus cock rings are great for enhancing boners.

Cons: If it seems too cutesy for you, skip the ring on the dessert part and just give ’em the ring as a gift.

Switch it up: A vibrating cock ring with make it feel even better.

Make it hotter: Have the whole damn dinner naked, keeping the dessert in full view so they can see what they’re in for.

How to do it: A partner with a vulva lies on their back with their legs slightly spread. The giver kneels or lies between their legs for an oral/fingering hybrid. They make a V with their fingers with so that one finger is on each side of the receiver’s vulva, then commence the oral sex.

Pros: The V finger move makes the ultra-sensitive tip of the clit pop out for easier access.

Cons: Some vulvas like more indirect stim. If that’s the case, try it, but with the gentlest light licks and see how it goes.

Switch it up: Try sucking the clit, whole mouth suction with a tongue flicking over the clit, wide flat sweeps of the tongue — see what feels good.

Make it hotter: Add extra stimulation with a glass dildo or lubed finger curved into the vagina.

How to do it: Spend the whole night in each other’s arms with swaddling sex — a kind of extended snuggle, but with penetration. The idea is to stop mid-sex, then fall asleep entwined.

Pros: It’s a way to stay in a connected in a state of semi-arousal all night long.

Cons: Can feel a little too close for comfort if you need your own private side of the bed.

Switch it up: If you’re both back sleepers, try falling asleep with your hands cupped over each other’s groins.

Make it hotter: Use it as extended, slo-mo edging by getting each other close, but not quite to, orgasm every time you wake up in the night.

How to do it: Assume the spooning position except the little spoon lifts their legs so there is better access to their clit or penis.

Pros: Both partners have access to stimulate little spoon with a toy or a hand.

Cons: Little spoon’s lifted leg can get tired. Big spoon can hook their arm under their partner’s knee, or little spoon can bend their leg and rest their foot on their partner’s thigh.

Switch it up: Try it with pegging. The big spoon can go in anally and use their other hand to stroke their partner’s penis or vulva.

Make it hotter: For extra clit stim, spread arousal oil over the vulva and clit, recommends LELO sexpert Laurie Mintz, author of Becoming Cliterate.

How to do it: If you’re out at dinner or a party, spend the evening building anticipation so when you finally get your hands on each other, you’ll both be beyond ready. This one is not a position so much as a vibe, so it can take whatever form you’d like. No ideas? Go to the bathroom during dessert and text your partner a sexy photo you took and/or whisper in your partner’s ear and tell them exactly what you want to do later, suggests Niki Davis-Fainbloom, a relationship counsellor and fetish expert.

Pros: Desire = arousal that is denied. The more you up the arousal and (temporary) denial, the hotter it will be.

Cons: It is possible to amp up desire so much that it becomes untenable. If that happens, duck into the bathroom together, or ask for the bill and get your asses home.

Switch it up: Pop in a wearable vibrator before you go out and hand your partner the remote.

Make it hotter: Keep the anticipation going even after you get home. Take it excruciatingly slow, pausing before touching a new body part until you’re both aching for it.

How to do it: Home alone? Kneel, then sit comfortably back comfortably on your heels so that you can use your hand to cup your vulva. Rock back and forth, pressing against your hand, suggests Pamela Madsen, founder of Back to the Body.

Pros: This can be used as a meditation to (literally) get in touch with your body, or go ahead and use it as a wanking method — up to you.

Cons: If your legs get tired, pop a pillow under your butt for extra support.

Switch it up: Add extra stimulation with a suction-cup dildo that will stick to the floor.

Make it hotter: Prop a wand vibrator on or under a pillow and hump away.

How to do it: Get in the lotus position with one person sitting on their butt with their legs crossed. The other person sits on their partner’s lap, facing their partner and wrapping their legs around their hips. Use a rope or silk ties to loosely bind yourselves into the position.

Pros: A classic Tantric pose gets a kinky twist with bondage.

Cons: Safety is super important. Don’t attempt this one if you’re not experienced with rope bondage. Keep the ties loose and have scissors right there with you.

Switch it up: Focus on eye contact and synched breathing for more intimacy, suggests sex coach Sylvie Bee of Sex and Sensibility.

Make it hotter: If you have extra rope, bind your hands together for extra connection.

How to do it: The receiver hops up on a countertop and lies on their back with their hips near the edge. The giver stands to enter via strap-on or penis.

Pros: Deep penetration with an element of drama.

Cons: You’ll need a very sturdy table. If you’ve gone too hard at IKEA, try a sturdier counter top (if that will work with the giver’s height).

Switch it up: Try it with oral sex and/or fingering.

Make it hotter: Leave room between your bodies for extra clit stimulation. Try touching yourselves while watching each other before you slide into each other.

How to do it: Grab your devices for a long-distance date. Do the whole thing, have dinner or drinks together, then take it more naked. Slowly strip off your clothes piece by piece. Tease each other by touching yourselves and describing what you’ll do next time you get your hands on each other.

Pros: Everyone is in charge of their own stimulation, so they’ll get exactly the kind of touch they want.

Cons: You’ll need a well-charged device and wifi. Plan accordingly.

Switch it up: Not sure what to say? Try a hardcore session of Truth or Dare to break the ice.

Make it hotter: If you’re not into exhibitionism, all good. An audio-only call can be even hotter.

How to do it: “Lie facing each other on your sides. One partner holds a wand vibrator between your bodies on a lower setting, and you grind together on the bulbous head, building arousal slowly,” says Tomchesson.

Pros: “This position invites eye contact, slow kisses, and whispered dirty talk,” she says. Excellent for when you absolutely can’t get enough of each other.

Cons: If one partner has a penis, they probably won’t love pressing against a wand, so nix that part.

Switch it up: If you want penetration, grab your favourite lube, then the receiver wraps their leg around the partner and draws them close, she says.

Make it hotter: “Valentine’s Day falls on a Saturday this year. Why not stay in bed all morning?” says Tomchesson.

How to do it: Both partners stand facing each other. The receiver wraps their leg around their partner’s waist so they can thrust via penis or strap-on.

Pros: “People fantasise about sex against the wall,” says erotic romcom writer Liv Arnold. This is you living that dream.

Cons: Standing sex is hard to maintain for a long time and won’t work well if your heights don’t align or you have a physical limitation. Give it go for a moment or two to recreate that ‘I must fuck you now’ vibe of Heated Rivalry. Then hit the bed.

Switch it up: Try it with the giver holding the receiver up by the butt, pressing them against the wall.

Make it hotter: If you’re super into standing sex, a sex swing can keep you aloft.

How to do it: The receiver leans over a consenting object like a table, chair, or countertop and the giver leans over to their partner from behind.

Pros: Deep penetration, plus all the feral potential of, ‘I just need to bend you over right now.’

Cons: No stimulation up front for the receiver. A hand from either of you can help with that.

Switch it up: Try it with a more BDSM-y edge. The giver can slap butt, pull hair — whatever you two agree on.

Make it hotter: If you’re near the fridge, grab an ice cube for impromptu temperature play.

How to do it: If you’re going to be apart for Valentine’s Day, set up your computers so that you can share some celebratory masturbation. Pleasure yourselves while you watch each other.

Pros: “Sexting is great, but a little virtual masturbation party is even better,” says Carrie Smith, VP of new product development at Cake.

Cons: Jerking off on camera can feel oddly more vulnerable that doing it with someone in person. Try dimming the lights or flirting with each other a ton beforehand so you’re so turned on you don’t care that you’re on camera.

Switch it up: Take turns being the voyeur, then the exhibitionist, switching off until you both want to explode.

Make it hotter: Is your love language gift giving/receiving? “Sending your partner a bottle of arousal gel as a surprise gift will keep them happy (and hot!),” says Smith. Tell each other exactly what to do with your new gifts.

How to do it: The receiver lies on their stomach. The giver lies on top of them, entering from behind.

Pros: Even though there’s no eye contact, this one can feel surprisingly intimate because you’re pressed so closely together. Plus the receiver just gets to lie there and be ravished.

Cons: Pretty much zero clit stim for a clit-having receiver. They can press a lubey hand against their vulva or fire up a toy.

Switch it up: If you’re working with a smaller penis or strap-on, a pillow under the receiver’s hips will create a better fit.

Make it hotter: Nothing hotter than a giver who is growling words of lust into the receiver’s ear while they’re pressing in/on them.

How to do it: Lie back and spread your legs. Hold a suction-style clit vibe with one hand while you lube up a glass dildo or other internal vibrator and slide it into your vagina, pressing it against the upper wall.

Pros: The dual stimulation will give you an insanely deep and intense orgasm.

Cons: It’s a little spendy since you need two toys. For the budget version, slide a finger inside, pressing and rubbing it against the top wall.

Switch it up: Try it with a CBD arousal gel. Rub it in 10 minutes beforehand to let to take effect. (Plus rubbing it in for 10 minutes is its own thing.)

Make it hotter: Need more? Damn, girl. Add a third layer of stimulation with a butt plug.

How to do it: Lie down facing each other and intertwine your arms and legs. Rock against each other, letting the person whose leg is on top control the speed.

Pros: Extremely intimate, plus everyone has a free hand to add more stimulation where they need it.

Cons: This is more romantic than raw. If you need more drama, add some really filthy dirty talk.

Switch it up: It you’re working with two vulvas and want to add some penetration, try a double-headed dildo.

Make it hotter: Try a non-penetrative version. Lube up your hands and stroke each other. If you’re into lube, throw down a blanket and smear tons of it all other yourselves.

How to do it: If you’re apart on V-day, give your partner the gift of you and a private cam session. Have your partner tell you what they want to see and give them the show of their dreams.

Pros: Long-distance sex can be surprisingly hot because it there are so many opportunities to get creative.

Cons: You’re not laying hands on each other. Remote controlled toys can semi-fill the gap.

Switch it up: Switch roles and let the other partner perform.

Make it hotter: Instead of an improv session, one person can prep a little show for their partner ahead of time. Take it hard-core, fully costumed, romantic soft lighting, in character — whatever you want.

How to do it: Get on your knees and face each other. Masturbate while watching each other.

Pros: Mutual masturbation is intimate, connecting, and vulnerable. Plus it gives you both a personal tutorial on how your partner likes to be touched.

Cons: Your preferred method of wankery might not be kneeling. Try taking opposite ends of the couch and lie facing each other with your legs entwined.

Switch it up: Scoot closer, lube up your hands and stroke each other.

Make it hotter: Try it in front of a mirror. Light a candle for bonus sex magic.