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12 polyamorous celebrities who've opened up about non-monogamy
These celebrities are exploring relationships on their own terms
By now, you probably know all about ethical non-monogamy, polyamory and open relationships. Alternative relationship styles have become more mainstream and more celebrated in recent years and in part, we have proud poly celebrities to thank for that. That and the fact that our sex and relationships education in schools is getting far more detailed and inclusive, and the creation of awareness events like Day of Visibility for Non Monogamy. After all, why shouldn't you be proud of your relationship? Whatever it looks like.
There are way more non-monogamous celebrities than you might think, from famous married couples in open marriages to celebs who have experimented with being in a throuple or having multiple partners outside of their 'primary partner'.
Obviously the growing number of polyamorous celebrities is mirrored by an uptake in non-monogamy among we regular folk. In fact, data from ethical dating app Feeld found that the number of users who mentioned ethical non-monogamy, and poly-related terms in the United Kingdom increased by a whopping 140% in 2021.
All this suggests that an open and meaningful exploration and sexual practice of non-monogamy is becoming much more popular and not limited to people in alternative lifestyles. In short, polyamory is officially hitting the mainstream.
Stateside, a poll of 1300 adults by YouGovAmerica suggested that one third of US adults would say their ideal relationship is non-monogamous to a degree. It's clear that more and more people are rejecting social conventions around love and relationships and embodying a more fluid approach to dating - and that includes openly polyamorous celebs like Willow Smith and Bella Thorne, as well as rumoured polyamorous celebs like Rita Ora, Taika Waititi and Tessa Thompson.
Did you know these 11 celebs were polyamorous?
RuPaul
Probably the most famous drag queen in the world and brain behind the runaway (or should that be runway?) success that is RuPaul's Drag Race, RuPaul has recently revealed that he and his husband are in an open relationship.
In an interview with the New Yorker, Mama Ru' said "It’s just realistic. There’s no such thing as monogamy with men.”
Erm, we're not sure we agree with that — especially given how many women are on this list.
Polyamory, non-monogamy and open-relationships are for anyone who want them, and a recent study found that 11% of women consider themselves among those who'd want one.
Plus, lots of men, as well as lots of women, prefer monogamous relationships and stay in the happily. Monogamy and non-monogamy is nothing to do with gender, it's all about people's preferences and doing what's best for them. Can I get an Amen?
Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith
The actor couple has been outspoken about their exploration of an open marriage and in 2021, Will Smith discussed it in an interview with GQ.
“The experiences that the freedoms that we've given one another and the unconditional support, to me, is the highest definition of love.”
Will and Jada are probably the best-known 'open' celebrity couple but they're certainly not the only ones.
Bella Thorne
While the trio are no longer together, Bella Thorne was publicly in a throuple with rapper Mod Sun and influencer Tana Mongeau from 2017 to 2019.
She alluded to the relationship in an interview with Cosmopolitan US in 2019. “I love loving two people at once” she said. And to be honest, we agree. There's more love to go around!
Yungblud
In 2020, musician Yungblud opened up about his sexuality in an interview with Attitude and discussed how his ex Halsey, who is openly bisexual, helped him explore his sexual identity.
"I probably would say now, I am polyamorous. Before I didn’t f***ing know what I was."
It can be challenging to figure out where exactly on the spectrum of relationship styles you sit. Some people move in and out of monogamy, whereas some will only date other poly or ENM people, which can make some people feel pressure to pick a label.
Kehlani
In 2018, musician Kehlani wrote on Twitter that they were a "lil poly pansexual" though fans were left unclear if they were identifying as polyamorous or polysexual.
Later, in 2020, they appeared on The Breakfast Club and revealed that they had been in an open relationship with ex-flame YG when asked about alleged pictures of him "cheating" by kissing a woman outside of a club.
"That wasn't a rule-breaking situation. I just don't feel like getting online and deeply explaining that that is not a situation that matters to me then I gotta deal with everybody coming at my mentality about an open relationship."
And that's the thing. Your boundaries are your own, you dictate them. They're super important in open or ENM relationships and they could look all kinds of ways. For polyamorous people, knowing your partner kissed someone else might actually be a source of joy and not of betrayal.
Willow Smith
In 2021, musician Willow Smith came out as polyamorous while speaking with her mother Jada Pinkett-Smith and grandmother Adrienne Banfield-Norrison on The Red Table Talk.
"With polyamory, I feel like the main foundation is the freedom to be able to create a relationship style that works for you,” she explained.
More and more gen-z people are identifying as polyamorous or relationship curious. New data from a report by Tinder has shown that gen-z is actually more concerned with open-mindedness than looks. They would rather date someone who is open to trying new relationship styles than someone who looks pretty.
Shailene Woodley
Actor Shailene Woodley explained that she has been in both monogamous and non-monogamous partnerships in her life while speaking to The New York Times in 2020.
“I'm someone who has experienced both an open relationship and a deeply monogamous relationship in my life.”
The freedom to choose is everything in these scenarios and you should never "go poly" because a partner is pressuring you to. It has to be a reflection of what you want and sometimes, you might prefer a closed relationship.
That's your call and you can change your mind any time you want based on what makes you feel most comfortable. Relationships are hard enough as it is without having to pick a side.
Ezra Miller
The actor opened up to Playboy in 2018 about the importance of finding 'queer beings who understand me as a queer being off the bat" and integrating them into their polycule (an interconnected network of people in non-monogamous relationships with one another).
"Then they are in the squad - the polycule. And I know they’re going to love everyone else in the polycule because we’re in the polycule, and we love each other so much.”
Polyamory is tied strongly to a sense of community. Your polycule or your boyfriends and girlfriends, they will all be people who likely think like you do and this results in the best kinds of friendships.
It takes work, but people who identity as poly talk about the connections they make with lovers of lovers and friends of friends in the most beautiful ways. It doesn't always work out, but when it does, it can be a very rewarding relationship style.
Indya Moore
In 2018, the Pose actor took to Twitter to open up about their identity, though did not clarify whether they were identifying as polyamorous or polysexual.
"So, I realised I’m poly" Indya Moore said. And it was a brave thing to do. Because alternative relationship styles are still frowned upon by many. There are a ton of myths surrounding ethical non monogamy - that people are greedy, hypersexual and disrespectful, that everyone lies and cheats on each other and no one is happy.
Obviously it takes a *lot* of communication and respect to healthily date more than one person at once but coming out as being in a poly or open relationship can be daunting because of these stereotypes.
Nico Tortorella
Younger actor Nico Tortorella wrote an essay for them. in 2018 about their polyamorous marriage with activist Bethany Meyers.
“We became polyamorous without ever really trying, and we let each other go so often; I guess we finally realized it's the reason we are impenetrable."
Polyamory is powerful and it can force you to be far more mindful of your actions and behaviours towards others in a way we aren't really encouraged to do in traditional monogamous relationships.
Opening a relationship and maintaining deep love and respect for your partner is no mean feat and it can teach you a *lot* about yourself.
Bob the Drag Queen
Bob the Drag Queen, the season 8 winner of Ru Paul’s Drag Race posted a YouTube video in November 2020 introducing his two boyfriends, musician Ezra Michel and photographer Jacob Ritts, to his followers.
“The main rule is we don’t lie to each other… and so far I think we’re nailing that,” he said.
And that's relationship advice for the ages - it doesn't matter how many people you're seeing at one time, honesty and good communication are the MVP of any healthy relationship.
Frankie Grande
While they split amicably in 2019, the influencer and former Celebrity Big Brother contestant spoke to Access Live in 2018 about his relationship with a married gay couple.
“I was very open to the possibilities of what love looks like, or what love could be, and it just happened.”
Sometimes, you can be part of an open marriage without *actually* being married. Dating couples as a solo polyam person or as another couple is something plenty of people are doing these days. After all, why settle for attention from just one person when you could be getting it from three, four or more?
Interested in learning more about non monogamy and ethical open relationships? Read our guide to unicorning and ENM.
Megan Wallace (they/them) is Cosmopolitan UK’s Former Sex and Relationships Editor covering sexual pleasure, sex toys, LGBTQIA+ identity, dating and romance. They have covered sexuality and relationships for over five years and are the founder of the PULP zine, which publishes essays on culture and sex. In their spare time, they can be found exploring the London kink scene and planning dates on Feeld.
Emilie Lavinia is Cosmopolitan UK's Former Sex and Relationships Editor. An accredited Sex Educator and Sexologist, Emilie explores identity, equity and innovations in sex, love, wellness and identity with her writing, broadcasting, coaching and commercial work. Emilie has written for the likes of The Guardian, Stylist, Grazia, Woman & Home, Red and Women's Health. She has appeared in documentaries exploring sex and wellbeing by ITV, Channel 5 and the BBC. Emilie has represented the UK as a United Nations Delegate and is a passionate advocate for women's health, LGBTQ+ rights and sex education and public health policy. She is a representative for Young Women's Trust, United Nations Women and The Porn Conversation and works with a number of charities. She loves big books, Bell Hooks, her infrared sauna and her Pomeranian, Ivy Valentine. She lives in London and can give you a rating out of 10 for every sex toy ever invented. Sign up to Emilie's Substack newsletter The Cuff for spice and advice or follow her on LinkedIn, X, Instagram, or her website: emilielavinia.com
Lois Shearing is Cosmoplitan's Former Senior Sex and Relationship Writer. They have been writing about sex, sexuality, gender, politics, and relationships for almost ten years. Their writing on these topics has appeared in Mashable, The Independent, Metro, The Advocate, and Byline Times, among others. In 2021, they published their first book, Bi the Way with JKP. They are currently working on two other books, set to be published in 2024. In a previous life, they worked as a content marketer and content writer for various tech start-ups. They continue to be interested in the tech sector and its impact on our lives, relationships, and work, with particular regard to the ways AI will shape our relationships in the future. Outside of work, they are deeply passionate about queer community organising, and run the only support resource for bisexual survivors of sexual violence in the UK: the Bi Survivors Network. You can find them on Instagram and X.
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