The last time I touched down in the Canary Islands was when I was seven — barely old enough to remember my fleeting holiday friends’ parents drunkenly dancing at the hotel ‘disco’, and the seven family-friendly pools to wade through during the day.
So, naturally, I’ve always thought of it as a family destination, or somewhere late teens go to escape steep flight costs.
But I was pleasantly surprised to find there’s a serene side to Gran Canaria — one focused on lounging beneath the glaring sun (the average temperature is 27 degrees year-round - lush) and clearing your pollution-clogged sinuses at one of its countless Thalassos.
A four hour 30 minute flight from London, Gran Canaria is just far enough away from the UK to forget where you are, and makes a great escape for some sun in the grizzly months.
Where we stayed: Maspalomas
Gran Canaria’s main ports are Playa del Inglés and Puerto Rico in the South of the Island, so if you’re looking to escape the family holiday vibe, opt for somewhere outside of the prime destinations.
It’s about an hour drive from one side of the island to the other, so if you rent a car, you’ll be able to stay in and explore its different spots. But, keen to avoid having to wrestle with European drivers and a boiling hot car, my partner and I decided to opt to stay in one spot for the duration of our trip.
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If there’s one place that maintains that tranquility while remaining easy to venture out to surrounding areas, it’s Maspalomas. So named because it’s a two minute walk from the beach, we stayed at the 70s-inspired Seaside Palm Beach Hotel, a peaceful cove of flora that contains a spa, as well as several pools, restaurants, and cafes.
Each room is splashed in vibrant colours (ours was orange), and while walking around the hotel you’ll find a red disco room filled with iridescent paillettes, alongside a terrace with two à la carte restaurants and an African Bar for a mid-afternoon pick-me-up.
Its rear windows overlook the Maspalomas sand dunes, a 404-hectare protected nature reserve with beige bumps and dips as far as the eye can see. If you choose to brave the heat and walk over them, make sure you’re wearing sandals as the sand is scorching beneath your feet, and watch out — you might even stumble across the naturists lurking in the bushes.
Things to do in Maspalomas
Gloria Palace Amadores Thalasso
The largest Thalasso in Europe, Gloria Palace Amadores Thalasso & Hotel was designed by Gran Canarian architect Luis López to be at one with the ocean. Offering views of the Atlantic, this dreamscape comes in the form of a dome-shaped glass room, which houses four seawater pools heated between 16 and 37 degrees.
Each one is kitted out with countless ‘hydrotherapy stations’ and ‘microbubble seats’ (essentially adult water park features designed to help you unwind and improve your wellbeing), which you’re encouraged to pummel yourself beneath, along with floating downstream, plunging in a cold pool before lounging in a warm one, and swimming through an arch to the outdoors where water trickles down the mountainside.
We also braved another cold plunge in the adjoining room before going into the sauna, steam room, and jacuzzi.
Splash out on a spa treatment
While we were more than satisfied to lounge by its three pools all day, or sip on an Aperol while we snacked on tapas at the African bar, the hotel is also home to a spa reminiscent of White Lotus season three — but without the weird vibes, promise.
Deciding to treat ourselves (it’s a holiday after all), we booked in for a Paintai Luar massage, one of the hotel’s many treatments, which involves a sack of medical herbs being heated to 120 degrees before being scrubbed all over your body to relieve tension.
And because we know you’re worried about us in these trying (not) times, you’ll be pleased to hear we did get the chance to clear our senses at the Bio sauna before indulging in the hotel’s delicacies.
Walk on the sand dunes
Calling all early birds, as you’ll want to beat the heat with this one. We had big Ppans to work up an appetite by completing the one hour walk across the dunes to Restaurante Marisqueria Rias Bajas in Maspalomas.
However, we soon gave up because one (sweaty) ridged peak later, and the ocean was calling us.
We did glimpse some naturists behind some supremely sparse bushes, though, and the view from the top of the dune over the mountains was spectacular. No prizes for the first one to climb one dune more than we did.
If you’d rather avoid steep slopes, you can head the opposite direction towards Maspalomas Lighthouse and Meloneras, where you’ll find plenty of beachside bars.
Visit Perchel Beach Club
Take a taxi out to Perchel Beach Club, the largest family-friendly beach club in the Canary Islands (don’t drive — you’ll want to indulge in something from its long cocktails list, or a glass of wine at the very least).
You can rent a sunbed for anywhere between €30 (which gets you an individual sunbed) and €250 (for a grand cocoon) per day, for lounging and gazing over the club’s glistening infinity pool to the Atlantic ocean beyond — if it’s a clear day you’ll even be able to see Tenerife.
Not to state the obvious or anything, but don’t forget your suncream — and reapply it liberally. All I can say is sun: 1; me: 0.
Where to eat
Il Giardino, African Bar, and barbecue night at the hotel
Il Giardino
It’s always ideal when you don’t have to stray outside the hotel to find a decent meal. Il Giardino is the Palm Beach Hotel’s Italian à la carte restaurant, where we had possibly the best meal of our trip.
Whole grilled fish is accompanied by courgette fries, spinach, and a whole host of mediterranean-inspired accoutrements. There’s a long wine list, which the waiters happily assisted us with (I can’t pretend to know wine), and you’re surrounded by palm trees and live music. Dreamy.
African Bar
It’s no secret that Spain is the home to amazing snacks, so don’t turn a blind eye to Bar Africano at the hotel when mid-day hunger strikes. Having woken up for an early flight, we hungrily feasted on fried calamari with aioli, papas arrugadas (a local dish where potatoes are boiled to a wrinkle in heavily salted water), and sizzling garlic prawns before heading to the pool.
Barbecue night
Exhausted on our last night, nothing could have been better than a barbecue night at the hotel. Choose any fillet of fish you like to be grilled in front of you, before choosing from a selection of fresh pastas in any sauce that takes your fancy, salad, ratatouille, more of those delicious papas arrugadas, and ice cream sundae for pud.
Gorbea
After drenching ourselves in salt water every which way, we headed to the roof of Gloria Palace hotel for dinner. Here, you’ll get 360 views of the ocean; we watched the sunset as we enjoyed salmon avocado tartare and hake in a salsa verde.
A dessert girl at heart, I was relieved to split a warm apple tart and cheesecake to end a good meal.
Ristaurante Marisqueria Rias Bajas
After two swims and an Aperol spritz at the gay nudist beach bar we stumbled across (you really can’t make these things up) following our epic dune failure, we gave in and ordered a taxi to have lunch at Rias Bajas in Maspalomas.
Food was on the pricier side, but we were glad to have made it, and we had a light lunch of fresh and juicy seafood snacks — shout out to the sizzling garlic prawns. Yum.
Find out more about the spa and wellness options on the island, here.
Honey is the Senior Sex and Relationships E-commerce Writer for Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health and Men’s Health. She covers shopping guides and reviews of the best sex toys; deals events — including Amazon Prime Day and Black Friday; and sex, dating, and LGBTQ+ trends.
Her journalism career started in 2020 when she started Sextras, a podcast and digital magazine about sex and relationships. Find Sextras on Spotify or Substack, where she writes and chats about everything from positive masculinity and how to practise sex magic, to why the latest kink or porn category is blowing up.
She has an MA in Magazine Journalism from City, University of London, and previously reported for HR magazine. Her features also appear in Glamour, Refinery29, The Independent, and more.
When she's not asking everyone she meets invasive questions about their sex and dating lives, you'll find Honey singing around her flat, teaching herself a new craft, or working her way through a new '90s/'00s box set with her flatmate.
