For years, I've watched as some of TV's most prolific fashionistas have graced our screens to tell us what we should and shouldn't wear. Tips like: figure-hugging clothes aren't 'forgiving', skinny jeans should only be reserved for skinny women, patterned trousers will widen your hips, and the all too familiar, horizontal stripes will make you look fatter. And if not on TV, the words; 'flattering', 'hide', and 'soothe', have been plastered through the media and across billboards to educate bodies like mine on how to disguise their ‘problem areas’ with clothes.
But what happens when you no longer subscribe to the 'rules'? I've found that, while there might not be an orchestra or flash mob to greet me every time I step out of my front door, there's a sense of pride that comes from dressing how I want. I follow the 'life is too short' philosophy and I refuse to one day regret not wearing something that could have sparked joy.
Cosmo Curve has been running since 2018 and, as the section's new Contributing Editor, I'm excited to continue creating a space that helps our readers feel 'seen'. Curve is more than just discussing which plus-size icon is killing it this week or what you should be spending your money on. This section is about representation and giving those who inhabit larger bodies the opportunity to be recognised, heard and understood.
To kick off my new role, I've taken on the challenge to show you just how amazing plus-size women can look in some of trends the fashion world has deemed to be 'faux pas'.
1. No crop tops
Despite starting my body confidence journey five years ago, only in the last year have I felt comfortable wearing crop tops. Even at my smallest, the desire to wear clothes that would show off a part of my body that I had programmed, in my head, to be my ‘problem area’ was daunting. And in all honesty, can still be a daunting experience to this day.
Like every aspect of my life, working to break vicious cycles and negative thinking patterns is essential. So I began to ask myself: ‘Why do you feel you aren’t worthy of wearing this item?’ ‘Where did this thought come from?’ ‘Does your desire to cover up come from shame and fear that others will judge you?’ ‘How much do you value the opinion of others over your own?’. While this isn’t the routine Q&A session one has before opening their wardrobe, asking these questions has helped to break down the negative thoughts I had about my body and, by extension, what I could and couldn’t wear.
What I’ve learnt is most people are so wrapped up in their insecurities that they care much less about you and what you’re wearing, than you care about them and what they might be thinking. So for me, the crop top went from a faux pas to a go-to item. I’ve now come to realise I’ve developed my own rule of wearing a crop top with either a high-waisted trouser or skirt and it makes me feel confident. Although many have written that this trend is only for those with flat stomachs, I love how crop tops accentuate my curves. For an edgy and fresh take, I’ve paired an oversized crop denim jacket with a matching denim skirt from PrettyLittleThing. This outfit draws attention to the waist and shows off my silhouette.
2. Avoid big coats
“Does this make me look fatter?" I would ask every time it reached autumn-winter, and I was forced to transition from my lighter jackets to thicker coats. There's something about looking larger that evokes fear in many, and especially in plus-size women, who may often find tips and tricks to look slimmer. Whether it’s using shapewear, opting for shirts and dresses that nip in at the waist or only ever wearing a high-waisted jean.
More so now than ever, I love to use coats as the statement piece of an outfit. The bigger and bolder the better. The days of throwing on a faux fur or puffer coat and questioning whether it makes me look big are long behind me. Instead, it’s “if I take this off, will my outfit be boring?” I’m not sure what changed, but finding coats that look great and are a fashion moment in themselves now inspire me. Because sometimes you just want to match a casual look of jeans and a white t-shirt and know your statement coat will do all the talking for you.
3. Steer clear of bright colours
One thing you can say about plus size fashion is there's an abundance of black or dark coloured clothing to choose from. But, finding a moderately bold and bright item in your size and in-stock might be a little bit more of a challenge. Why might this be? The only explanation could be the idea that all women supposedly love to wear black to look slimmer. So, it follows that a plus-size woman would (and should) only want to wear the hue. Cue: *eyeroll*.
While I'm sure some women feel most comfortable in those colours, others demand to be seen and desire to be bold. Every time I put on something colourful, it's like eating a bar of chocolate after a long day. It makes me feel happier and more confident. So, yes, I'd rather still look fat in a vibrant colour than slimmer in black.
This lilac suit from ASOS, styled with a bright animal print bodysuit and gold jewellery from DIXIEGRAZE, is the type of outfit I’d wear day or night, work or play. It feels fun, it feels cool and it makes me happy. Clothes should be expressive, so in a bid to show my personality, I’ll be as loud with my clothing options as I am carefree with my voice.
4. Ditch figure-hugging items
Described as ‘unflattering’ and ‘unforgiving’ on larger bodies, while praised as ‘sexy’, and ‘attractive’ on the likes of the Kardashians, the discussion of whether curvier women should or shouldn't wear body-con has largely been debated. Depending on where you look, some fashion rules suggest that plus-size women should look to disguise and minimise the appearance of their rolls, and arguably, form-fitted clothes do neither. But why should I be ashamed of my body?
2018 was my year of embracing figure-hugging items, which for some might sound like a minor thing. However, when you've spent most of your teenage years despising the vessel that carries you, it feels revolutionary to wear a piece that would have sent previous you into a spiral. There's beauty in stepping out of your comfort zone and finding out it's not that bad.
This beautiful two-piece from Kai Collective is precisely the reason why I dismiss this fashion 'faux pas'. Despite being figure-hugging, there’s not a single part of me that puts this on and feels ashamed or like I shouldn’t wear this. In fact, seeing myself in this for the first time was empowering - an experience I may have never felt if I stuck to those 'rules'.
5. No bold patterns
This isn't another plus-size piece on florals. Trust me, I'm as over them as Miranda Priestly. But more about the kind of patterns and prints that turn heads. I'm talking: fearless animal prints and flamboyant designs that scream maximalism. So, ignore the idea that those bold statement trousers will widen your hips, or that clashing print dress will accentuate your ‘problem areas’ and have some fun with it.
These '90s check trousers from ASOS are exactly what I mean when I say have fun with this trend. Fashion doesn’t always have to be serious, sometimes it’s just about wearing a funky pair of trousers and matching green sunglasses. Not once did it cross my mind that maybe these trousers make my hips appear larger. But that’s what happens when you wear clothes that make you feel comfortable and great.
Ultimately, fashion should be used as a tool to express yourself. The worries of whether one looks ‘too fat’, ‘too wide’, ‘too tall’ or ‘too short’ shouldn't hold you back, if you feel good in what you wear. So, join me in my act of rebellion by refusing to conform to outdated ‘rules’ and instead remember life's too short.
For too long we’ve listened to those in high positions tell us what we should and shouldn’t think about our bodies; what we can and cannot wear and what makes a us beautiful and stylish. These standards of beauty have marginalised people of colour, those who are plus-size, less-able bodied, and those who don’t conform to gender norms. May this section of Curve Cosmopolitan be a place of rebellion, revolution and recognition.
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