“Fancy another?”
I look across at my friend’s glass. It’s drained, all the salt licked from the rim. My own margarita sits in front of me, mysteriously full. I don’t understand. We’ve been here a while, and it is time for another drink. Except… it isn’t. Not for me.
Sh*t, I think. It’s worked. It’s actually worked. What’s going to happen to me now?
The party decades
I didn’t think of hypnotism as an actual solution, to actual problems until, one summer afternoon, I sat in Leicester Square, with a friend, pigeons hobbling all around us. My friend told me that this would have been impossible for her a year ago, that she had had a bird phobia, since childhood but had recently had it hypnotised out of her.
What could hypnotism help me with? I wondered. A few months later, my Instagram algorithm answered the question for me: you could be hypnotised for binge drinking. I’ve had a rollercoaster relationship with alcohol, for the best part of 20 years. When I was 19-years-old I watched as a tumour ate away, slowly, devastatingly, at my mum's brain, until it completed its destruction. She died and I was left… numb.
I was detached from my body. I observed myself, for years acting like a normal person. Smiling in a way that was only really showing my teeth, speaking as if I had been given lines. I found that, to escape this character that I had created for myself, I could go to a bar, order five tequila shots, and slam them, in a neat little row.
This was a pattern that got better over time. I began to enjoy my life more, and with that, I began to enjoy alcohol more. But still, when bad things happened, I turned to alcohol. Then, one night, just after lockdown had lifted, my decades of seeking danger as a distraction caught up with me: my drink was spiked. This wasn’t my fault. We should be allowed to party, without fear, without risk of being taken advantage of. But still, the experience jolted me awake. I took four-months off drinking and reassessed my relationship with it.
That was four years ago and today I don’t drink when I am sad, but I also wouldn’t say my relationship with alcohol is ‘normal.’ I have developed an irritating habit of saying yes to “one more” and that leading me to miss my train home, and out of necessity (and not wanting to pay a £80 taxi fare) having to stay out all night. (not: I should add, as my editor is reading this, on work days, of course).
But I also don’t want to be sober. I love click-clacking my way into a fancy event and being handed a glass of free champagne; I love splitting a bottle of wine with a friend, us both confessing our secrets and I love pints of Strongbow and Black on a Sunday, in a grimy pub where the locals call me “darlin’”.
The problem is: moderation is notoriously difficult when alcohol’s number one job is lowering inhibitions. Meaning that I can go into an event, resolve to just have one or two but that one (or two) begins to whisper into my ear: “you could have another, go on, it won’t hurt” and then, before I know it, I’m asking a stripper to teach me how to twerk, in a Soho basement, or paying one of London’s many tuk-tuk drivers to ride me across Westminster Bridge, Britney blasting out. Things that are oh-so-fun until the next day and the toilet bowl is chastising me as I vomit up memories from the night before.
What if, somehow, I could hack my brain into stopping, after one or two drinks? Hypnotherapy seemed to suggest this was possible: with growing research showing that it’s an impactful tool in rewiring our brains and giving some much-needed control back. There was only one way to find out…
Going under
Aaron Surtees has a voice like gravel. I want him to narrate my night-times, read me fairytales until I drift off into a slumber. But, his power and huge success as the UK’s most recommended hypnotist is not just down to his (quite literally) hypnotic voice. He’s worked in the industry for 15 years and is trained to the highest level Advanced Clinical Hypnotherapy and NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming). He has also combined his hypnotic techniques with advanced modern mind programming known as the ‘Surtees Method’ and is Director of City Hypnosis. In short: I trust him. Trusting hypnosis to change me, on the other hand, would take more convincing.
Whenever I’ve tried to fully understand how hypnosis works I’ve had to slam my laptop shut and thank the universe that I work for Cosmopolitan and not New Scientist. It’s very complex but, essentially, studies have found that when we’re hypnotized our theta brain waves are stimulated. Our alpha brainwaves are the ones whirring away always, our delta waves are increased during sleep and our theta waves are somewhere in between. These are a slower set of waves, with a high amplitude associated with many areas of cognition including attention, decision-making, drowsiness, emotional arousal, and storage and retrieval of memories. What’s more, the dorsal anterior cingulate cortex (dACC), insula, and dorsolateral prefrontal cortex (DLPFC) are impacted by hypnosis, with the dACC’s three major functions involving: monitoring our environment for anxiety, and rewards, controlling our behavior, changing it to fit within the monitored context and motivating us toward achieving a certain outcome. So, the bits we need to be able to communicate properly with to bring around future change.
After a few sessions with Aaron I began to see it as if he had learned how to unlock my brain, get in there and (gently) tell it off a bit and guide my brain into making better decisions. And he did it in a way that felt mysteriously simple.
Each session was different but followed a similar format: I’d get all snuggly on a Lay-Z boy chair, and Aaron would begin to speak to me through headphones. The background noise was trickling water and he would ask me to picture myself in various places: in forests, in memories that made me happy and in places that brought me joy. While ‘in’ those places I would have to ‘pick up’ and ‘feel’ the objects surrounding me. Then, I’d ‘go’ to a room with a blackboard and write numbers, with Aaron counting down. Sometimes it would skip, like from 10 to 7 suddenly and I didn’t know if that was a technique to confuddle my brain or I somehow blacked out during his speech.
During this stage though, mostly I’d be thinking, actively, about all sorts of crap and panicking (particularly during the first session) that it wasn’t going to work and, because I need hypnotized to stop me from being such a damn people pleaser, I’d have to lie to Aaron and say it was. Cue me panicking that he’d be able to use his magic mind to tell I was lying.
Thankfully, it never came to that, as, eventually he said “you can’t lift your legs” and I realized that I absolutely could not. What followed was this floating feeling, as if I was flipping over and over, in space, in my own mind. It felt a little like being on a Sticky Wall at the fairground, or that moment during the waltzers when gravity takes over and you’re flung back in your seat.
This was the point when my mind was sticky to suggestion, and Aaron repeated phrases to do with how to practice moderation, with lots of emphasis on how good it would make me feel to drink less. I did four sessions in total and these statements changed, depending on the conversations we had, so, for example, I told him that, after our first session, I’d gone out and it had been working until a friend bought me a special drink and I felt guilty not drinking it, the people-pleaser inside of me more powerful than the hypnosis. So, he said “I will not compromise my health to please others,” the next time, tailoring the experience for my own needs.
So… has it worked?
The margarita mystery night was just two sessions in, and since then, there’s been so many examples of how Aaron’s words have wormed their way into my brain, making me act unconsciously in a way that I enjoy… but that also freaks me out a bit.
I’ve always been a fast drinker, even with soft drinks I gulp them down, but, since being hypnotized I am drinking so much slower. But without even thinking about it. I’m not making a conscious effort to slow down, I just naturally am. When I first started on the sessions I mused that perhaps the success rate is only so high because people pay a lot for this and want to make sure they get their money’s worth and that influences their behaviour. I wondered as I wasn’t paying (my sessions were free in exchange for an honest review) this would impact its efficacy on me, but not so, from the very first session I noticed a subtle change in my drinking habits that increased its power the more I went to see Aaron.
Drinking slower means that the alcohol’s impact is working at the same rate as my body’s metabolism of it, so it doesn’t have the same opportunity to coerce me into making bad decisions. I haven't had a hangover for around six weeks, since I first started seeing him. I used to have one at least once a week, often robbing me of an entire day and not shifting.
But, strangely, I've not yet learned what my new brain actually wants. I don't order drinks nearly as frequently as before but when I do, I order as if I am the person I was pre-hypnosis. So, I’ve found myself agreeing to split another bottle of wine with a friend and then, when the wine arrives, trying to drink it but finding I physically can’t. Like the liquid in the glass repulses me. Or, I’ll say yes to a cocktail after a pint and then have to give my cocktail away to someone else as I can’t drink it. Last night I said "go on" to a Happy Hour offer of 2-4-1 on cocktails and then had to throw the second one away. This never would have happened before.
At first, I really didn’t like this. At all. Not just because it's a waste of money to order things you can't drink, but because drinking and being a ‘party girl’ is so embroidered into my being I felt like an essential part of myself had been robbed. I’d go home after two drinks, tired after finding the atmosphere of the party too loud and be fearful I’d become one of those people who started banging on about the joy of staying in. No shade to you guys, but that is not who I am: I’m a social person who loves variety, meeting new people and seeing where the nights take me. Yes, alcohol has brought some terrible things into my life but it's also brought some brilliant ones. I’ve made best friends in basement bars and had experiences that I know I’ll be happy to have lived, when I am on my death bed.
Then, four days after my final session, I went to a Butlins Adult Weekender. For those who have not experienced this, it’s like Freshers Week, for those who should know better. People go off-the-hook. It was the ultimate test and yes, I did drink, and yes I did get drunk. Each day I had, on average, around five drinks. Which, while it’s not the hypnotized “stop after three” had I been in my old mind I would have had, at least, twenty drinks. I would not have remembered any of it. I would have kept seeking party, after party, until I could no longer stand. The weekend was exactly how I want to drink: being tuned into all the fun I was having. I love festival season and know, in the future, I still want to have a blow-out weekend, being silly and chaotic with my friends.
Could having those drinks at Butlins have messed it all up? On my return I was terrified that I might have “broken” whatever magic Aaron had cast on me. As time has gone on I’ve realized how badly I want the hypnotism to work. I don’t want to waste whole days being sick and I don’t want to feel like my entire persona is wrapped up in what’s found at the bottom of a glass.
I think the first is easier to come by, and the second will take more work. As since Butlins I’ve had a few evenings out where, thankfully, I’ve discovered the spell has not been broken but, I’ve also struggled to come to terms with not being the last one standing or being the sparkliest (read: drunkest) person in the room. As while Aaron can get to work on so many different things (including, take note, getting over your ex) these are things I need to work on consciously, rather than subconsciously. It will take time to erase all the false ideas I have in my head about alcohol and what it brings me. I need to show myself that I am just as fun (maybe even more so!) with three drinks in me, rather than triple that. This is something I know, deep down, I've wanted for a long, long time and now, thanks to the new magic off-switch in my brain, I'm in a much stronger place to get there.
Sessions at City Hypnosis can be booked for everything from controlled drinking to cutting out sugar, and range from £350 to £450, per session. To quit smoking there's a one-off session priced at £595.
Aaron's hypnosis sessions can also be accessed via his app subconsciously, or at one of his regular Master Your Mind. His book Subconsciously: Powerful Stories of Lives Changed Through Hypnotherapy and How You Can Do The Same can be found here.
Catriona Innes is Commissioning Director at Cosmopolitan, you can follow her on Substack and on Instagram.
Catriona Innes is Cosmopolitan UK’s multiple award-winning Commissioning Editor, who has won BSME awards both for her longform investigative journalism as well as for leading the Cosmopolitan features department. Alongside commissioning and editing the features section, both online and in print, Catriona regularly writes her own hard-hitting investigations spending months researching some of the most pressing issues affecting young women today.
She has spent time undercover with specialist police forces, domestic abuse social workers and even Playboy Bunnies to create articles that take readers to the heart of the story. Catriona is also a published author, poet and volunteers with a number of organisations that directly help the homeless community of London. She’s often found challenging her weak ankles in towering heels through the streets of Soho. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter.
