When someone’s curls are flourishing, or the ’fit is fitting, Black women don’t just compliment each other—we elevate. We exalt. We practically break into praise twerks, full-body hollers that say, “I see you, and you’re killing it!” Put another way, if complimenting were an Olympic sport, Black women would be the Sha’Carri Richardsons of the track—nails did, edges laid, and absolutely smoking the competition with every word of affirmation. One “Okay, skin!” and we’re off the blocks. A “You ate that!” and we’re hitting top speed. We hype each other up with the kind of wind-in-your-hair brilliance that leaves everyone else in the dust. Records broken. Medals secured. And a victory lap dripping in gold.
Honestly, I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve gone about my day, minding my own well-moisturized business, when a Black woman I’ve never met stops mid-stride to vocally admire some aspect of my look. And you best believe I dish it right back, because in a world that too often tries to dim our light, this is how we keep the love (and serotonin) flowing. Our compliment culture is reciprocity as radical joy—we insist on naming each other’s shine, celebrating it, and amplifying it, creating tiny moments of safety with every “Slayyy,” “Yes, sis,” and “You did that!” Gassing each other up is our communal care: part pep talk, part information swap, full-on spiritual uplift.
Just last week, I ran across a busy street—literally risking my life in Manhattan traffic—because I spotted a woman on the other side with an insanely gorgeous Afro. I had to tell her. I had to. Five minutes later, I walked away with not only her entire haircare routine but also a heart full of that warm, fuzzy feeling you get when another Black woman pours into you.
While this is a love language Black women have mastered, trust and believe it’s also one that anyone can adopt. In the meantime, turn the page for a few of the beauty obsessions I’ve been hearing about lately. Call them love notes in product form, because the real secret behind a great glow is adoration of each other.

Julee Wilson is Beauty Editor at Large at Cosmopolitan. Previously, Julee was Beauty Director at Cosmo and Global Beauty Director at Essence and has held various editorial positions at Huffington Post and Real Simple. She counts herself lucky AF that she gets to play with beauty products for a living and tell dope stories. And if you’re as obsessed with beauty as she is, make sure to follow her on Instagram for plenty of product recs, natural hair inspo, skincare testing, and Black girl magic shenanigans.
















