Because the internet is the internet, Sabrina Carpenter’s iconic ‘Juno’ sex positions—aka the PG yet provocative poses she strikes during each performance of the sexy song on the Short n’ Sweet tour—are no stranger to occasional controversy. Take last month in Paris, when the star got in an Eiffel Tower pose with two male dancers and headline-making levels of social media discourse ensued. Her most recent pose, however, seems to have generated not so much the typical shock and outrage as…confusion?
Last week during the Stockholm stint of the tour, our favorite fearlessly horny pop star dropped to her knees, placed her hands parallel to each other just in front of her face, leaned in, and quickly moved her face back and forth while blowing her lips. Most seemed to gather that Sabrina was miming motorboating, aka the fine art of placing one’s face between a pair of tig ol’ biddies and shaking it back and forth while blowing a raspberry (you know, for the “motorboat” sound). Which…seems right to me!
Somehow, however, other denizens of the internet seem to have found the gesture more difficult to interpret, with some suggesting Sabrina was motorboating ass cheeks or miming a rim job. (The latter of which I would assume could only come from someone who has never actually…given a rim job, but that’s neither here nor there!) A particularly confusing genre of tweets even refers to the position as “an act of oral fortification” (???) which is…not a thing? (I have to assume they meant oral fornication which is…also not really a thing?)
Meanwhile, those on Team Motorboat have chided the heteronormative presumptions of those who think Sabrina was performing a fake sex act on an imaginary man’s ass instead of on an imaginary woman’s breasts, while others are apparently distressed by the supposedly male gaze-appeasing nature of motorboating, which…are we okay, guys?
All things considered though, whatever confusion this mimed motorboating has caused is relatively minor compared to the usual scandalized pearl-clutching that tends to follow Sabrina Carpenter every time she does a horny Sabrina Carpenter thing. Unfortunately, this incident does, as others have noted, reveal a much more troubling reality: that we, as a society, appear to be losing touch with the art of motorboating. May Sabrina guide us back to more enlightened times.
