Meggie Gates
Meggie Gates is a comedian and writer in Chicago. Their work has appeared in Bitch Media, Cosmopolitan, and Consequence of Sound. They’re a horny little goblin with a penchant for Doritos
155 Sweet Things to Say to Your Girlfriend to Totally Turn Her Day Around
Sometimes, she just needs to hear that you're totally obsessed with her!
Oct 8, 2025
Alright, I Found It: The Best Song to F*ck to Is “Holding Out for a Hero” From ‘Shrek’
“Just as Fairy Godmother draped herself across the piano, I pulled my girlfriend to my lap and started to finger her rhythmically to the beat of the music, plunging my pointer finger in and out as Fairy Godmother ran in place.”
Jul 22, 2021